Do you have emotional blocks? Do you suppress your emotions? If you do, you may often find that no matter how much you eat well and workout, you still can't seem to lose that layer of fat that helps to keep your tummy extra warm. You may also find that you may start working out and get very emotional and without realizing why, you have stopped your regimen.
So what should you do? Work them abs and work out your emotions.
Your stomach is really where you store your emotions and if you aren't letting them flow, they get stuck there. As a protection and comfort mechanism, your body starts to store fat there. Getting strong in that area, will tell your body you don't need that form of protection or comfort. But this only works if you are willing to deal with the emotions that come up as an result of your ab work. So try it out. The perks are pretty awesome if you ask me, nice abs and being emotionally balanced. What!?!? Heal yourself!!

We don't need to know everything. In fact, I think it is in the mystery where we experience the most growth. There was a time in my life when I thought I had plateaued in my knowledge. It sounds completely ridiculous to say that now, but there was a time. Of course, that facade came crashing down around me and I learned a lot about myself and that I am not always the pillar of peace. I was livid when it all happened and had very violent fantasies involving nudity, a wolf, a stick, and destruction. When I told my friends about them, they laughed and made jokes about fairies dying when I got angry. Gotta love your friends! It was sobering, jokes included, but it helped me find my true voice. It dared me to be okay with being a perpetual student and I accepted the position.

I recently had a conversation with a nice fella and I asked him what joy looked like. He said plenty, but never answered my question. I even gave examples emphasizing sight. He mentioned how joy is different to each person, he described contentment, the nature of joy, he vaguely mentioned something about a desirable image, but he still didn't tell me what joy looked like to him. The key verb was look and the most important subject of the verb was "you", but he didn't seem to pick up on that. In many ways, I understood. I have been in that kind of hot seat before. I took a spiritual business class and the teacher asked each of us, "What is time?" No one could really answer the question. I remember hearing everyone's explanation of time and each time they got shot down. It was my turn and I tried to answer the question. Eventually I simply said that I didn't know...and I really didn't. I was lauded for my honest answer. My whole mind was twisted and no matter how I tried, I couldn't find the answer. I later learned that what she was saying was if you can't really define time, why worry about it. She wanted us to define our moments, for ourselves, without the pressure of time.

Without realizing it, my line of questioning was similar. I asked him this because in our conversation I realized the importance of knowing what joy looks like to us and embodying it. It has been said that we are spiritual beings having an human experience and I fully agree with that. I know that who I am is spiritual (or non-physical). I am that mystery. I also recognize that I came here to have a physical experience and because I do, it can't be negated when it comes to understanding things like love, joy, and pain. Pain has a look. Love has an appearance and so does joy. Joy has a taste, a smell; it is a feeling. So why did I ask this fella what joy looked like to him?

Truthfully, it was because in all of his pictures that I saw, I only saw one that exuded pure joy. His other pictures had glimpses, but this one was different. It was an older picture of him. He looked relaxed, comfortable, even a little bashful, but joyful. I also noticed that was the picture he seemed to criticize the most. I used to be embarrassed about the pictures of myself that showed all of my gums. When the joy pours out, my gums like to make a showy appearance. So when I asked him the question, I was asking if he could recognize the moments when he exuded his joy. I was wondering if he liked what it looked like when it showed up. Did he like how he was expressing himself? I remember being so joyful in middle school the day I wore my magenta pants inside out paired with yet another original hairstyle I made up the night before.  I enjoyed expressing myself even if there wasn't a rhyme or reason to it. Of course, he may say he wasn't joyful at all during that time, but that isn't important to me. It is more important that we all take the time to decide what joy looks like to us and find the ways, circumstances, states of being where it resides and exude it.

Too often we walk around with a serious face. I know I have been guilty of that. During my first year in college, my scowl was a main topic of my concern professors. I was even pulled into an office about it. They wanted to know what was wrong with me. I was intimidated by the environment because I had never seen that many intelligent people in one place before even though you couldn't get me to admit it. My sour face was a protection mechanism. Later a different professor and random people on the street taught me the power of my smile and exuding my joy. Joy has changed my life. Sure pain is a part of life, but joy trumps it over and over if you let it. I say, let it pour out into everything you do.

Love, joy and pain are constantly unfolding  their truth to us. There definition is never static so it doesn't make sense to claim dominion over them. Be the student of the present and watch the mystery reveal itself. Love guides it all. So I ask you, my readers, what does joy look like to you? Are you willing to commit to living in it and oozing it out from your heart? In the extremely modified NYC Homeland security slogan, If you see something called joy, show it to the world! <------ That is where your true power lies...

Special thanks goes to everyone who helped me write this post past, present, physical, and non-physical. You know who you are...

Really...What does joy look like to you?

Oftentimes when I write, I play music. I am playing music right now actually. I would love to tell you all that I put on a playlist and let the words flow but it isn't true. For my most love-filled posts I require Whitney Houston's Just the Lonely. There is something about that song that forces me to dig deep. She is singing to this guy asking him if he is ready for all of her lovin' or if he is just lonely. For me it is like a personal love song that keeps me in check. It is like my higher self saying, "Hey gal, are you going to bring it or are you just going to scratch the surface?" From there I find that every word type just flows because I so want to answer that challenging question. Am I ready for love? Am I ready for this grand responsibility to be committed to love? Writing for me is a love ritual. It is my way of showing my commitment to myself and to the love I am.

It helps that I am a big planner. It isn't that I am meticulous; I like to set the stage. For example, I knew that one day I would have locs. I wasn't sure when I was going to do it but I knew that I would have to exhaust all other hair styles I had an interest in before I was willing to make the commitment.  So, I did. I played with my hair until I realized I was done. So it was very loosely planned and when everything was aligned, I went for it. This helped me greatly because I knew my family wouldn't approve but because I did everything I needed to do to be clear in my decision their moans and groans and subtle suggestions in the awkward growing stages fell on insensitive ears. I made a clear commitment to my hair and myself that couldn't be moved. It was like that Musiq song "You and Me". If they can't bear to see me happy with my locs then it will be us against the world. I guess this means I embarked on a love affair with my hair. We have had our ups and downs, but I wouldn't trade it for any other way to enjoy my hair.

Still playing Whitney by the way....

I think it is safe to say we all love "love" when it seems to be working out. We like the giddy feelings, the good days, and the sound of our own laugh. Or is that just me? But when it comes to making a commitment, I go back to this song. How many times are we just doing "lonely talking"? Whitney says that she will still be there after she fulfills his needs even though she knows this guy may leave. To me she plays the role of love itself in the song. She is so forgiving. She accepts this guy for who he is but encourages, challenges him to be honest with himself. Can he commit to having the real conversation? Can he commit?

I apply this song to everything I say/feel I love. I apply it to my Reiki practice, my writing, my hair, my friendships, and though it pains me to admit it to, you, my readers, my desire for family. Long-term commitments, for most of my life, have petrified me. I have enjoyed my ability to break free of situations. I used to love putting in my notice of leave at jobs. I am still happy about my great escape capabilities but ever since I entered this love world I feel a little differently. I need to apply different skills to love because this is a world I am not keen on leaving. It would be like leaving myself and that doesn't make sense. I only share this because I know there are a few of you out there just like me...and because I am listening to this song on repeat and she keeps asking if I am ready for love. Geez Whitney.

Do I think I am ready? Yes and no. But she(Whit/Love) keeps on talking about sharing a dream she has visualized. Love has a dream that it wants to share with me and I want in on it. I mean she wants to talk, she is practically begging, so it isn't all about her dream. I feel like she is open to what I have been drumming up as well. It is the mystery of this conversation that scares me, but I am willing to enter. I am willing to commit this time. Without commitment, I wouldn't have this glorious mane, this blog, this business, my health, my knowledge, and whatever is around that mysterious corner for me. Purple with fear, I am willing to commit to love. Luckily purple looks good on me.

So I write this to suggest that maybe we should find greater greatness to commit to. Ha!..."greater greatness". I think what holds us back is that we have said no to mediocrity for so long that when that good stuff comes along we don't know how to break the habit of chucking the deuces(leaving). My greater greatness is love. What is it for you?

What is a Reiki Session like with me? Hmmm. Where do I begin?
As I have continued to grow in my practice, I have shaped my own way of doing things. A session with me definitely isn't a be still and silent experience. It doesn't mean I am against it, but that just isn't what happens. Surprisingly, most of my clients have been long-distance over the phone or via-skype. When I first started, I thought I would be this traveling Reiki practitioner making house calls laying  my healing hands on random people. I am not ruling it out, but so far it has been done in the comfort of my home, and the people are not so random. I love the hands-on part of the practice, but I love to communicate and move freely even more, and it seems like the people who are attracted to me like to do the same. So against the format I was introduced into, I just let people talk and I do my thing on the other side. What has evolved out of it is an awesome Distance Reiki session and a healing conversation. The conversations are great, transformative, and even quite comical. I think love-filled laughter is sometimes what we need the most and I have plenty of that.

Though I am light-hearted, I am also very serious about what I do. I don't give Reiki for entertainment or for simple curiosity. Anyone who comes to me must be ready to work on themselves. No one gets off the hook, not even longtime close friends. I do not play. I give out reading material prior to the session and homework after the session. I love this journey I am on and know and live the benefits, so it wouldn't make sense for me to support the contrary.
I feel the people who come to me now, know what I am about and I have no problem laying down the law if they are not sure...but it is all in love. Someone described working with me as "gentle and loving" and I can resonate with that. The atmosphere is non-judgmental and open. I can truly talk about anything and I know that is what makes this format work. It helps that all kinds of crazy things are known to fly out of my mouth. I have a knack for crude metaphors.

I work with all kinds of people with different reasons for wanting to have a Reiki session. The overall consensus is that they feel they need to heal something or move past something, broken hearts, stagnation, creative blocks, physical pain, depression, insomnia, and the list goes on. People also tend to come to Reiki when they are ready to make a big shift. At least when they are working with me. Usually they are diving deep in spiritual exploration and are learning that they need more answers. Does Reiki give them answers? I wouldn't say that exactly, but I do notice that those answers tend to come a little faster. No matter what, it is the recipient of the energy who makes the magic happen, and Reiki is like a really powerful yet gentle boost in their efforts. Our conversations help to bring up the stuff they are ready to start working on. I do deal with physical ailments, but I work to get to the root cause of why the discomfort is there in the first place. With Reiki, it is all about root causes. We really go deep.

I don't care what anyone says or how they do it, but to me, Reiki is fun. No matter how a session starts out or how many tears are shed (not all the time), it always ends with mutual gratitude, lots of smiles and giggles. When I get off the phone, I run around the house excited and full of joy, every time. I truly love what I do. At a certain point in my life, I committed myself to making sure whatever I do is fun.  It's a life rule and I definitely bring that commitment to the sessions.

If you want to know more, just ask me at [email protected]. 

The first post I ever made in this blog was about going within. I was learning the uses of Reiki in my own life and was applying it to everything. I wrote that post shortly after I did my first meditation with Reiki in which I went deep within myself. You see, I was asking those big questions: Who am I? What am I here for? What is this all about? Where are my ancestors? It was a powerful experience that yielded several revelations, the most important one was that I was not alone. Within me was a world of ancestors, guides, and yes angels. Since then, the revelations have been continuous and I am convinced that there is no plateau of knowledge. If I am always growing, so is knowledge and so is my spiritual posse.

No matter what religious beliefs you hold, eventually you have to realize that your spiritual journey is all about you. You can read books, blog posts like this one, watch videos, go to church, have soul-stirring tantric sex but eventually you have to walk away from it all (hopefully you will return to the sex) and deal with yourself to find the truth. Recently I started learning about galaxies and planets and how there are billions of earth-like planets. This made me feel very small, really small. It isn't a concept that is easy to wrap your mind around. Hell, I trip out when I drive in a neighborhood and realize that people live in those homes. So, to think there are billions of earth-like planets in existence...wow... But then, I also remember the never-ending vast universe I know that is within and it also makes me look around my life, the biggest life I know, and the only one I have control over.

To be honest with you, sometimes I need help. I needed my mother to act like a cheerleader (literally) yesterday so that I could get motivated to wash my clothes, all five loads. I needed my dear friend to talk to me about the beauty of body hair because I was sad about saying goodbye to it since the weather is getting warmer, genuinely sad, even though when I tried to cry about it nothing came out. My mother laughed at that attempt. I needed comfort from an angelic presence in the middle of the night when the astral realm was getting super intense for me. There are times when we need guidance that we can trust and it can come from beyond our physical perception.

When I did that meditation, I asked where my ancestors were. I realized that they were within. I actually saw and felt them and since I knew where I was, I knew where they were. After that, I began speaking to my ancestors with greater confidence. I was no longer speaking empty words to an empty room, hoping someone would hear me. I was no longer afraid to speak to guides who had come to me a few years back because I wasn't sure who I was speaking to. I was no longer skeptical of the existence of angels when I realized within I could fly, love, and glitter too. When I realized this whole world was inside of me, comprised me, it made no sense for me to deny the presence of those who could help me. Essentially I am helping myself.

Between my clients and the super magical people I meet, the most frequent thing I find myself telling them is to talk to their ancestors. Everyone's journey is unique and what works for me may not work for you. The ancient knowledge that you have within is your personal life manual. Why wouldn't you open it up? I am not someone who needs an expert or science to prove things to be true. All science is trying to do is explain spirituality. I rather just go to the source, which is me, to find out all I need to know. I trust my ancestors, guides, and angels to guide me in accordance to my highest good. I don't do it because it sounds cool or out of desperation, but because I feel their love and I know they are a part of me.  I trust myself and my path.

You are the key to unlock all of the codes within you. All you have to do is tap into the love you are, start talking, and then shut up and listen. They will talk back, you just have to be willing to listen. This is especially for those of you who are intuitive and feel like you have energy or entities around you. Having these conversations will really help to release the fears you have regarding psychic gifts or the non-physical world you sense within and outside of you. I speak from experience. I have one of the baddest posses around and when I need them, they show up. Tap into yours!

How, you ask? Get creative and develop your own meditation. The goal is to go deeply within. If you always thought you were like water, see a lake, declare it is you, and go deep sea diving. I heard one person turned themselves inside out and explore from there. That sounded kind of gross to me but it worked for them. If you make the method, it will work. I don't care how you do it, I just want you to do it. Let this be your encouragement to go deeper and ask those big questions. Don't be surprised if Grandma shows up to chat it up with you.

As above, so below. As within, so without.