I have done 3 Free Reiki Fridays since I have started my practice. I started it because I wanted to get more experience and find a way to introduce Reiki and what I do to people/potential clients. I have always been a one-on-one person even at parties, so I decided instead of sending out a big Reiki blast to all of the participants, I would work on each person individually. The con to this is that it takes a lot of time (several hours) if you have a list of 50 people. but the pro is that I get to connect with so many different and amazing people while gaining a ton of invaluable experience. My lists have all been comprised of close friends, old friends, and people I know through Facebook, and then complete strangers...oh and my mom. She loves free Reiki.
Prior to doing Free Reiki Friday, I knew I could could connect with those who have transitioned, but for the most part it was faint and experimental. Like I was able to connect with one of my friends who had passed and a few family members, but it wasn't easy, clear or whenever I wanted. So there I was with my list and working through each person on my list while jamming to the likes of Thelonious Monk, Duke Ellington, and Coltrane. I was halfway through the session I was giving to someone who happened to be my friend and suddenly my Pandora decides to play the jazz standard "Someone To Watch Over Me". At first I was going to skip the song because I didn't want the singing to mess up my concentration, but something told me to listen. The energy was flowing strongly so I didn't contest, I simply listened. A pretty standard session was changing dramatically as I felt tears starting to flow from my eyes. I felt so much love. My hands felt guided to go outside of her field and in my mind's eye I saw flashes of a man. I instantly knew it was her father. The song seemed to be in slow motion because each word sung had such a deeper meaning than ever before. I continued to cry involuntary. It was weird because I could tell we didn't speak the same language as I could actually feel his message being translated. It was truly heart to heart communication and my tears were joyous ones. I usually prefer a laughing fit over tears, but this time I took the tears with grace. His love for her was flooding over me as I absorbed his message. He came through so strongly. It felt like he was waiting for an opportunity to reach out to her and there I was.
If I had been playing around with communicating with our ancestors and loved ones before, that time was undeniably real. It was such a beautiful experience for me as I truly wasn't expecting it. It felt like time stopped and I stepped into an entirely different dimension. I wrote down the notes from her session and went to the next person on my list. The show had to go on. Later I sat down and wrote to her about what I experienced. She replied in gratitude. I can't be sure if she believed what I wrote, but I know she had to feel it.
All of my posts are related to the direction my Reiki practice is going and it seems like the theme as of late is all about relationships. Take this ride with me as we delve into my mind (filtered through my heart) to get to a bit of what it means to really have a healthy relationship. I have been spending the last two weeks (at least) working to have a deeper understanding of our connection as men and women because the demands of my practice have prompted, no, demanded me to go there. I am convinced that we are supposed to be together, us gals and guys. Our biology has us fitting together like puzzle pieces, sure, but it is more than that. It is in the pull and draw we emit towards each other that goes beyond words and explanation. We use the word "love", but right now I feel it isn't enough. It is the bond that goes beyond breath, sight, sound...into stillness. It is in our ability to create new life. Everything I have written isn't news to anyone I am sure, but I ask you to act like it is. Just do it. I go through this process every time to gain deeper insight; I assume nothing. Do that with me now.
I had this vision of men and women having a party together in some distant desert land. The women crowned in golden headdresses, the men draped in golden sashes, and the mummified corpse of their matriarch adorn in light blue and gold gently watching over the people as they revered her. Her presence got the party started. They had a ceremonial courting dance of sorts. The women would kick out their feet to the drum beat while flicking their wrists as they crossed their chests. The men would dance around the women with their backs to them as their shoulders seemed to lead the direction of their bodies. As the men would get closer to the women, the ladies would further entice by placing their hands on the sides of their face making a bursting like motion. It was a swirling dramatic scene. I sat in all white watching them in awe and wonder. They were so happy and exuberant. Joy twinkled in their mingling and I felt like a kid peaking in on my parents. But then there was a turn of events. The men started to be called away to a duty of some sort. It felt like war, a struggle only they would experience. As the men were disappearing the women kept on dancing. It was like they didn't want to lose the moment, their culture. The kept dancing but the movements, although precise, lacked their previous luster. The men started to comeback but now they were in the background, the sidelines, just watching. The women now danced with themselves. There was little interaction and it was almost like the men were never a part of this once sacred dance. The vision ended.
The first thing that came to mind was the so-called independent women (and men) of our time. What does it mean if it just means you have become accustomed to a lackluster life? What does tradition mean if it is no longer dynamic for the whole? If together they could make so much magic, why not find a way to do it in the new conditions? We create NEW life together, don't we?
The second thing that came to mind was understanding how the individual experiences we have in relationships often go overlooked or ignored. When we bond sexually with anyone it goes beyond the physical experience; you have made a secure connection with that person's energy. That is where the true marriage really happens, but so much of our current culture thrives in ignoring this reality. Without intercourse I can feel the emotions of someone else because I am an empath. It took me years to realize certain emotions were not my own and without emotional intelligence dealing with these mysterious emotions can be crippling and downright terrifying. In a relationship although your partner didn't experience your day, they feel all of the emotional baggage you have picked up through the bond you have made with each other. If your way of being with your emotions is to ignore them or pushed them down, then you have done the same to your partner. There can be no growth together if that's how you roll and there isn't a place for them in your world or on the dance floor. If what they are feeling is beyond the scope of your experience, it means you have to sit down and listen so that you can learn about what you are ALREADY empathizing and work through it together. That is the commitment you made when you were doing all that dancing and legs spreading. You bonded to their physical body consciously and most likely unconsciously to their mental, emotional, and spiritual body as well. A relationship cannot thrive if you ignore this.
I want to say there is a third thing just to keep this going but I don't think I had one. I did start talking to my friends about it, my vision. I told them they were going to help me write a blog and love them to bits, they did. I received both feminine and masculine perspectives because I love balance. What I found in talking to them is the same issue that I have consistently come across, the inability to receive. In so many cases, when one partner is put in a position to fend for themselves (often the woman) they form a protective shield. It becomes hard for them to receive because they have been accustomed to doing everything for themselves, being independent. The shock of acquiring these survivor skills is the same force that holds them into their pattern. The biggest problem is that this act (the holding pattern) isn't done out of trust or love, it is out of fear and and illusion of necessity. So this is the shift that needs to be made. We have to start moving into trust and love. We have to open our hearts and listen to its wisdom and open our legs and receive our puzzle piece (HA!). As we listen to our hearts, we have to recognize the connection we have to each other. Ever heard of the phrase, "Loving me is loving you."? If you really embark upon the journey of knowing yourself, you will also start to see all of your issues that are waiting to be healed. As you love each one, you also extend that love to your partner and then the legs start to creak open a little wider...bit by bit.
I'm convinced we weren't meant to do this life thing alone. Physically you entered the world alone but the bonds you have made along the way go way beyond the human flesh. Michael Jackson said, "you're just another part of me" and "you are not alone". I think he was going somewhere with that. It is up to us to break the pattern. He has to ask that lady to dance and lay out his confessions in his motions (energy in motion=emotion). She has to say yes and allow her body to move with his. His motions are new and different, but she is skilled at receiving this new knowledge, and finding her own rhythm as they groove. As they stay in this flow, they create something new, because that is what they do. They know as long as they have the music, the floor is theirs, and they always have the music.
Open your legs to healthy relationships. Open your legs to greater knowledge of self. Open them up to learning something new about your partner. Open them up to trust. Open your legs to that loving lion. Open them legs to divine partnership. Open 'em up to emotional intelligence. Open 'em w i d e to healing.
When we heal together...
The first post I ever made in this blog was about going within. I was learning the uses of Reiki in my own life and was applying it to everything. I wrote that post shortly after I did my first meditation with Reiki in which I went deep within myself. You see, I was asking those big questions: Who am I? What am I here for? What is this all about? Where are my ancestors? It was a powerful experience that yielded several revelations, the most important one was that I was not alone. Within me was a world of ancestors, guides, and yes angels. Since then, the revelations have been continuous and I am convinced that there is no plateau of knowledge. If I am always growing, so is knowledge and so is my spiritual posse.
No matter what religious beliefs you hold, eventually you have to realize that your spiritual journey is all about you. You can read books, blog posts like this one, watch videos, go to church, have soul-stirring tantric sex but eventually you have to walk away from it all (hopefully you will return to the sex) and deal with yourself to find the truth. Recently I started learning about galaxies and planets and how there are billions of earth-like planets. This made me feel very small, really small. It isn't a concept that is easy to wrap your mind around. Hell, I trip out when I drive in a neighborhood and realize that people live in those homes. So, to think there are billions of earth-like planets in existence...wow... But then, I also remember the never-ending vast universe I know that is within and it also makes me look around my life, the biggest life I know, and the only one I have control over.
To be honest with you, sometimes I need help. I needed my mother to act like a cheerleader (literally) yesterday so that I could get motivated to wash my clothes, all five loads. I needed my dear friend to talk to me about the beauty of body hair because I was sad about saying goodbye to it since the weather is getting warmer, genuinely sad, even though when I tried to cry about it nothing came out. My mother laughed at that attempt. I needed comfort from an angelic presence in the middle of the night when the astral realm was getting super intense for me. There are times when we need guidance that we can trust and it can come from beyond our physical perception.
When I did that meditation, I asked where my ancestors were. I realized that they were within. I actually saw and felt them and since I knew where I was, I knew where they were. After that, I began speaking to my ancestors with greater confidence. I was no longer speaking empty words to an empty room, hoping someone would hear me. I was no longer afraid to speak to guides who had come to me a few years back because I wasn't sure who I was speaking to. I was no longer skeptical of the existence of angels when I realized within I could fly, love, and glitter too. When I realized this whole world was inside of me, comprised me, it made no sense for me to deny the presence of those who could help me. Essentially I am helping myself.
Between my clients and the super magical people I meet, the most frequent thing I find myself telling them is to talk to their ancestors. Everyone's journey is unique and what works for me may not work for you. The ancient knowledge that you have within is your personal life manual. Why wouldn't you open it up? I am not someone who needs an expert or science to prove things to be true. All science is trying to do is explain spirituality. I rather just go to the source, which is me, to find out all I need to know. I trust my ancestors, guides, and angels to guide me in accordance to my highest good. I don't do it because it sounds cool or out of desperation, but because I feel their love and I know they are a part of me. I trust myself and my path.
You are the key to unlock all of the codes within you. All you have to do is tap into the love you are, start talking, and then shut up and listen. They will talk back, you just have to be willing to listen. This is especially for those of you who are intuitive and feel like you have energy or entities around you. Having these conversations will really help to release the fears you have regarding psychic gifts or the non-physical world you sense within and outside of you. I speak from experience. I have one of the baddest posses around and when I need them, they show up. Tap into yours!
How, you ask? Get creative and develop your own meditation. The goal is to go deeply within. If you always thought you were like water, see a lake, declare it is you, and go deep sea diving. I heard one person turned themselves inside out and explore from there. That sounded kind of gross to me but it worked for them. If you make the method, it will work. I don't care how you do it, I just want you to do it. Let this be your encouragement to go deeper and ask those big questions. Don't be surprised if Grandma shows up to chat it up with you.
As above, so below. As within, so without.
I write about love a lot. I can talk endlessly about love, and being that this is the season of romantic love, I thought I might share a bit about the type of man I love, my kind of Boo-peice. This is for all of you who think women only like a certain kind of man or for those who think that there is no such thing as a "good" man. I am fixin' to create one right now. Don't believe me, just read.
I love a playful man, a man who knows how to have fun in any situation. There is nothing worse than seeing a grown man be serious about everything. Yuck. I find it incredibly repulsive actually. See the man I love has a set of gold teeth on hand just in case we need to make a quick fake music video. He has jokes about preachers, spiritual folks, career folks, and anyone who is a little too serious. He gets me a thong that he knows I will never wear just to dance around in it and make me laugh. He sings me silly songs when I am in the bathroom for "support" and "inspiration". He laughs while waiting in long lines. He will dance slow to fast songs, fast to slow songs, and grind to country music (ow!). I love an imaginative man. I give him a word and he gives me a fantasy. He is friends with the orange dragon that flies me around at night as well. He sees that the sky is red and that the moon smiles. He is always creating something, never without ideas, and full of magical solutions. He wakes up ready to bring something new into the world and goes to bed knowing he has accomplished it. The gorgeous world he lives in, started in his mind. I love a gentle man. His strength isn't in "fronting" or acting like he is "hard", it is in walking tall in his gentleness. His nature makes people trust him and want to be around him and because of this, he is protected. Because of this, he can protect others. Oh and his massages are painless and transcendent. I love an intelligent man. He knows if he starts quoting other people, I will not be impressed (unless it is the late, great Johnny Cochran). He knows that if he is afraid of something and doesn't address it, I will remind him of emotional intelligence. He knows that when it comes to complaining and being the victim, ain't nobody got time for that. He knows that it feels great to take responsibility for his life. He knows I love a man courageous enough to be who he truly is, no matter how "crazy" that may look. I love a courageous man. He dives into the mystery. He reads something like this and doesn't flinch. He rises to the challenge to follow his destiny. He doesn't need the armor that a large ego provides. He lets his heart lead him. He serenades me with a mediocre voice in a crowded room but his courage and focus makes it sound angelic.
I love a man who loves himself. He doesn't claim to be perfect but because he truly loves himself he likes where he is going and how he is growing. He faithfully commits to expressing who he his. He loves himself because he knows who and what he is. He loves himself so that he may truly love others.
I love a childlike, magical, kind, confident, daring, loving man because that is the only kind of man I am willing to travel this world, create, and live on a farm with.
This love-filled outpouring was brought to you by meditation, Reiki, talking with my ancestors, listening to my heart, and Whitney Houston (again). Now go out there and dare to love what you know you truly love!
Ganesh doing his thing!
When I was younger my mother let me go to church with a work friend of hers every Sunday for maybe a year and a half. I loved it! It was a traditional Southern Baptist church equipped with a awesome choir and a hooting and hollering pastor. I saw it all as a great source of entertainment. Parishioners would "catch" the "holy spirit" and start dancing down the aisles. Random women would be releasing orgasmic cries to Jesus saying "Yes! Yes! Yes Jesus!" over and over again. Did I say I loved it?! It was fun to watch and afterwards I would probably get some fried chicken or ice cream. Life was good. I didn't like dressing up for church so I always had a change of clothes. I would strip down in the car to rid myself of those annoying dresses but other than that, I found church to be an enjoyable experience.
You see, I was never raised to have a particular religion so for me I was always studying and observing others who did. I would always go to my friends' churches whenever I was invited. My mother introduced us into Judaism by celebrating Hanukkah and into Islam by going to the Mosque. I never felt bound to any religion. The story of Jesus was simply a story about what everyone could do as a human being. I didn't understand the worshiping part. As a child I didn't know how to express how I felt about religion because I could see how passionate people were about it. I didn't want to argue or prove a point. It wasn't until I was twelve did I become more clear about how I felt. We had just moved to a new apartment and me being painfully shy at the time was struggling to make friends. Every morning at my bus stop was this Indian girl who clearly was in the same boat as me. We saw each other every morning and never spoke. Eventually someone had to introduce us and that is where it all changed for me. We slowly became friends and I would go to her house often. Her house was this amazing place filled with new aromas and images I had yet to see. She was Hindu and I was awestruck by the bindis, the colorful pictures of an multi-armed elephant, the henna designs, the curry, the altar, the man in the orange curtain... I would ask her and her brother endless questions. They would do their best to answer. I would study Hinduism in every encyclopedia I came across. I had to know more. Up until meeting her, I had experienced the more popular religions in American culture, but mostly Christianity. Hinduism was a brand new world for me and I liked it. I loved how every morning she kept her tradition and how she participated in her culture no matter what was going on outside.
Well one day three of us were talking about religion. It was her, I, and a wonderful guy who was holding a scarab beetle in his hand. We were asking each other about how we felt about it and I remember looking at her. She had to be one of the most sweetest people I ever met and at that moment I remembered how many times I heard that if you didn't believe in Jesus, you were going to hell. I couldn't look her in the eye and then say I believed in any religion that I had known previous to meeting her. So even though I was never attached to a religion, that day it became even clearer. Since then I have gone on to enjoy even more religions. I love learning and exploring other peoples way of life and observing the commonalities that we all seem to share. Yet and still, I do not ascribe to any religion. I am spiritual essence and that knowing is eternally fulfilling.
Nonetheless, when I speak or share what is in my heart, I often find my friends saying, "You are very Buddhist." or "You are more Christian than me." or "You are very Brazilian." and so on and so on. I always laugh at this and shake my head. They are perceiving me to be like them, not because I share their beliefs or culture, but because I like to connect to people on a heart to heart level. I can talk to anyone and relate to anyone. It isn't uncommon for my friends to end up on the phone with me for 2 hours and not know how it happened. One reason is because I can talk about anything and another reason is because I am truly interested in who they are. The people in my life amaze me. Their lives are sometimes difficult and stressful but they make so many amazing things happen. I see them growing everyday and it is a pleasure to know them and love them.
So why share this story? Well I was thinking about some of the fears I hear regarding Reiki and I wanted to address it. One of my friends said he doesn't "mess with that stuff". One of my friends refuses to learn more about it since he "has Jesus". And there are plenty more that are unspoken. From my story, I think it is clear that I don't carry fear about other sets of beliefs. My commitment in life is to "know" and not to focus on "believing". It is my experience with Reiki that allows me to write this, not my belief in it. Honestly Reiki isn't that special or mystical but it is at the same time; it is something that is innate in all of us but few tap into it. In fact, before it was called "Reiki" by a Japanese man, it was called something else and something else before that. For me, it is a loving energy that fills my entire being. When I share it with others, I get the sense that it first acts as a connector, connecting you to who/what you truly are. And what are we? We are spirituality. We are "life force". We are divine love. We live our lives as if we are not that. That is where I come in, I like to connect. I don't see this energy as outside of myself, I see it as a part of me. Did I take classes? Yes. Did someone "attune" me? Yes. But why? Essentially someone helped me connect to what was already inside of me and that is what any excellent teacher or healer does. And what does it feel like? Unconditional love, understanding, compassion. These feelings are constantly swirling within me now even on hard days. When I first aligned with the energy it felt like I was hugging myself on the inside and I laughed for the first month about everything. Love isn't really enough to describe it, but it is the only word I know that comes close. Is Reiki Hocus Pocus and Boogie Woogie? Try it and make a decision from there. How you connect what I have shared to your belief system is up to you but I do encourage you dig deeper. If I stopped at a Japanese man calling it "Reiki", this blog or website would not exist.
If you are curious and want to try it, email me at firstname.lastname@example.org. I will give it to you as a gift for your open-mindedness and bravery. I can promise you absolutely no hocus pocus or boogie woogie, just love and compassion.
Reiki has truly taken me on a journey. I can’t say if it forced or facilitated my journey within, but regardless I find myself in this wondrous exploration of who I truly am. For years I have heard various spiritual teachers and messengers telling people to “go within”, “all of our answers are within”, but the concept seemed so abstract. I couldn’t understand how to go within. Where was within? One night I decided I was going to figure it out. Some Reiki teachers will say that the most important part of having a Reiki practice is that the practitioner is actively healing themselves. I deeply agree with this. I never considered how many bodies I have until I had to use Reiki on not only my physical body but my spiritual, mental, and emotional bodies as well. Before I go to bed, after I send Reiki energy out to those who have asked for it or those who may need it, I give myself a Reiki session. That night I wanted to go within and so I sent Reiki energy to that effort, not sure of what the results would be. I started by simply observing my thoughts and I began to wonder their location. They were within. I then thought of my ancestors and when I sensed them. Where were they? Within. I observed my feelings. Where were they? Within. Everything was within. My concept of spirituality, divine power, loved ones who have transitioned, thoughts, feelings, memories, all the things that comprised me were within. That meant that I am all of those things. I then pushed it a little further and sought to know something that I thought I didn’t know. If I am all of these things then I must be knowledge as well. So I began to search for this bit of knowledge that I wanted to obtain within and I found it. It revealed itself to me quite easily. Of course that was just my beginning but it has helped me demystify a great amount of teachings and information I have come across the years.
I am sharing this to inspire those who are trying to do the same and for those who never considered it as a possibility. Is Reiki a prerequisite? Of course not. Reiki is my personal journey as a healer and artist. You only need a desire and openness to know that yourself is waiting for you to “go within”. I promise that you will not be disappointed.