Looking to the Ethers

Looking to the Ethers

I use imagery to remind me of where I come from and where I am going. I use darkness to see the image. In one of my live videos, a viewer tried to “love and light” me. They meant no harm by it. They really wanted to extend warm feelings towards me. Nonetheless, I had to stop and come clean about how I felt about the term. I have never liked it. I associated it with people wanting to sound as if they were something they weren’t, airy fairy love and light angels. I knew these people. I experienced their funk, sour attitudes, and near mental breakdowns. I knew parts of their heavy, icky truth and I couldn’t figure out why they thought they could run from it with that ridiculous phrase. In my mind I would say, “No honey, you need a dark room and a prayer to get you to any modicum of happiness or love”. No judgment, just observation and experience. Love and light will have you in a lovesick illusion. In the farce of being love on two legs the light blinds you from yourself. You can’t figure out why, especially when you had given so much love to the world. You were beaming everyone with that “love and light”. That means something, right? It’s a reflection of who you are, who we all are, right? Of course it will be reflected back, right? Nope, nope, and nope. What happened to law of attraction? Where is the love? I’ll tell you. It’s lost in an illusion of false narrative and self avoidance.

There is no love to experience if you aren’t willing to experience yourself. There is no love to give, if you haven’t given it to yourself. There is no love, if you haven’t found it in yourself. So walk deep in to your abyss and dare to see yourself, feel yourself, accept yourself, forgive yourself, and allow love to reveal itself to you. Fumble in your darkness until your vision adjusts. Let it be clear. You will no longer need to declare it. You won’t have to wait for it. It will be there. Not in a blinding way either. It will seep, swirl, caress, and emanate. It will be the moment, the silence, the stillness. It will be you. Love and darkness y’all!