So I was listening to some Marvin Gaye and... Isn't that how so many of these conversations begin?
Well really, I was in the shower, listening to Marvin Gaye getting my clean on and this idea for a post just popped into my head. They say that prostitution is the world's oldest profession but I truly feel a need to contend with that. I think, no I know, healers have had that same timeless demand. The real question is what were those women doing then in this profession we call prostitution? Much like everything we know now, the meaning and significance of sacred arts (especially sex) have been diluted, confused, and/or devolved. I will share with you something I know from my heart. and you are not required to believe it but take this journey with me anyway. Those ancient women were teaching men to love, truly love and they were treated as sacred. It wasn't their goal to have lifelong customers, it was their sacred charge to give them the tools to be able to truly love their mates and to love themselves. Well that sounds like a healer to me. If we look into Taoism we know that sexual energy is used to heal the body. Check out Healing Love by Mantak Chia if this is all foreign to you. Taoism teaches you to circulate chi aka ki (ReiKI hint! hint!) throughout your body to facilitate healing amongst other things. Essentially you are moving love around the body. Oooh wee! We can also look at ancient Indian temples and see people engaging in Sexual acts. Isn't a temple a healing place? I mean what do you go to church for, to shoot the shit? I am pretty sure we go to these places for healing. So if your body is your temple why aren't you finding ways to get the healing energy flowing? And I'm not talking about going to find someone to bump beauties with because that is a whole other post. I am talking about beginning to recognize how you have the power to heal yourself and that it is truly built in, innate. Reiki anyone? So back to my sacred ladies of the night...and day... or should I say Sexual healers (thanks Marvin)? These women were the masters of their craft but how about now? Well now you have someone called a sex surrogate. Their job is more aligned with what those ancient women did but now they are dealing with modern issues, sexual abuse, Catholic guilt, Mormon guilt, incest, pornography addictions, etc. They help people begin to feel confident with their sexuality, in the nude. They are like a super hands on counselor but the most important part is that they empower their clients to never come back. Our modern day prostitute or sex worker (as some prefer to be called) is more connected to the addictive consumerism that is pervasive in our society. They want you to come back. There are so many reasons for that but the main one is that they make more money if their customers feel weak. Kiki, why don't you bring this all together? Oh okay. No problem. As a healer of the non-sexual variety, I thought about how I want to connect with people and what my goals were in this business (before I took a shower today). I realized (with Marvin Gaye's help) I wanted to be able to really work with people so that they would feel so strong and equipped that they would eventually not comeback (but of course we can still be friends). So let's get it on! I am Kiki, your Reiki Surrogate. Thank you, go within.
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I took a 30-minute drive over to Scottsdale, AZ today to attend my first Reiki Share. My hermitic, extremely introspective, monastic days are coming to a close and to mark this transition, I decided to find great ways to engage with people (in the flesh). Uh oh. Reiki Shares have always been an option but I was never motivated to touch and be touched by random people. I know it is weird because in-person Reiki sessions involve touch...and that is probably the reason about 95% of my practice has been distant Reiki. Not since my attunement and my first client (other than my mother) have I actively sought opportunities to practice in-person until that day.
When I arrived to the location, I first took a drive around to survey the area. Since I would like to have my own center one day, I wanted to know what kind of environment a successful center would be surrounded by. Much to my delight, it was in a old school looking strip mall/small town commerce area. I also needed to know all the exits in case these people were a bunch of loons - they weren't. When I entered, I learned that the organizer was a hugger. Awkward. I went along with it for her, but gave a clear gesture to the middle-aged men that the hugging session was over by promptly sitting in a chair a good distance away. As people came in I started to smell the familiar scents that some spiritual, natural, folks like to have: funk with essential oils. I used my magic to make sure I wouldn't have to work with them and it worked (I have a sensitive nose). It was fairly large group of 15 people and everyone was all smiles. It seemed like 2/3 of the group were regulars and the rest were first-timers (like myself) and new-combers. The majority of the group were so-called Reiki Masters as I learned as we introduced ourselves. The term "Reiki Master" never sounded so silly until that moment and I expressed this sentiment to the group as I introduced myself. It was received with laughs and I was called a comedian, but I was serious. To begin we were asked as a group to send love and energy to places in the world that need healing. Syria was heavily on the minds of most or least it was implied that it should be. I don't like participating in group energy sending efforts but I also wanted to be open to something new. I decided that I would send energy to the hearts of all children who have to witness violence, destruction and turmoil. It wasn't necessarily a geographical location but it worked for me...and I love children. After that part was done, we all wrote down our healing intentions on a peice of paper and were separated into groups of 4 or 3. I was in a group of three of women and the first to lay on the table. It was nice because I hadn't received Reiki since my classes and it helped me get a feel for the environment. Usually after a session it is nice to talk to each other and share your experience but these women were very quiet. I thought it was odd, but then I quickly realized one was shy and the other simply had issues. The lady with the issues was next and her session was fine. I did notice that she was heavily attached to the Reiki Symbols. I don't use them in my practice but I could feel that she did as I was working on her. After her session, she refused to look at me. It was weird but I went with it and made a mental note to clear my energy really well. I went to the bathroom and literally washed her off. The last woman's session was awesome. While working on her, I saw a White Tiger appear and work with me. We had so much fun together, the tiger and I. He was playful and guided me. There were a few times I had to catch myself from breaking out into laughter. At one point he got on the table and ate out her insides. In real life that would have been horrible, but from a spiritual, energetic perspective it was so nice of him to do it (since she was working on releasing fear). After the session she told me that she felt and extra set of hands next to where I was working and when she peeked to see what was going on, she saw no one. I told her about the tiger and how I wasn't alone. It was a nice moment. One thing I noted was how dramatic people were when they were giving the sessions - lots of heavy breathing and arm waving. I am inherently very child-like so I am very giggly, lighthearted, playful, and almost nonchalant when I do this work. How else would I be playing with a Tiger during a session? I can even get a little pouty, but that is rare and is usually followed by laughter. It was very interesting to see such seriosness. One lady would even go into this trembling trance thing. Another man would work on people like he was Gollum and they were his "precious". The sessions were over but people were still around. I wanted to leave, but I also wanted to get the full experience. The owner of the center took a liking to me and showed me around. We even went to the crystal room and I played with a few of the crystals. I spoke to a few people and drank some water. "Gollum" said he wanted to work on me the next time and I have to admit I was curious about that experience. Everyone had the look of joy on their faces and all was good with the world until the organizer asked us to conclude by standing in a circle. In the circle we were asked to hold hands. Next we were asked to send OUR energy to the next person. I wasn't down with that so I protected my energy and blocked theirs. Oh yes, I did that! I didn't know these people well enough to exchange MY energy or to receive THEIRS. Eww! Then after that ridiculousness was finished we were asked to look into each other's eyes and feel that we are really one. This was so awkward and uncomfortable! I would meet someone's eyes and they might smile, but most of these eyes look desperate, hungry, and creepy to me. "Gollum" winked. My eyes darted quickly as I tried to prevent my body from noticibly jerking and twitching. It was horrible and I truly felt I was surrounded by starving insane zombies and that in fact we were not one. I did my best to make sure my demeanor didn't betray my feelings and my feet didn't spill the water of truth from my soul. I left the Reiki share with grace and smiles, but knew in my heart I wasn't down with the full program. Nice people though. With all that being said, I do encourage people to try out a Reiki share. Hahaha! It is definitely an experience worth having. I did experience profound healing after this session and a greater shift away from Reiki (a Japanese practice) and a deeper journey into a greater knowledge of energy healing and working with Divine/Primordial energy. The entire experience forced me to dig deeper into what I feel my soul is calling me to do. My knowledge and experience of Reiki helped me open the gateway, but I have only just begun. Please note that this post is in the case that you are working with an experienced, knowledgeable and professional Holistic Energy Practioner or Reiki Master. It isn't that rare to hear a story about an Energy healing or Reiki session gone weird. The practitioner works on the client, the session is awesome, they part ways feeling great, and later the practitioner gets a phone call or text from the client about the sexual connection felt. "It felt like sex," or "Did you feel what I felt?" or the lingering hug after the session that makes you raise an eyebrow. When you work so closely in someone's energy field it should be expected that both people will feel something. A practitioner will feel the imbalances, blocks, sources of discomfort in the client's field while the client might just feel tingly and relaxed. We are so used to our physical senses that when we feel the sensation of divine energy mingling and merging, it becomes hard to interpret. Sex is about union, merging and even if you have never experienced it when you have been bumping and pumping, it doesn't mean it isn't happening on some level. Sometimes we can be so closed and self-absorbed that physical sex is only about release or stress-reduction. Conversely, when you get an energy healing session you are asked, expected to open up and receive as the practitioner is sending loving, healing energy into your field to promote well-being. So there you are, on that rare occasion, open to feeling what you have been missing. It's that feeling when love reintroduces itself to love, that can be misinterpreted as a lusty, burning fire of sexual desire. And because the only other person in the room is the practitioner, the client can easily feel like this is something that they are sharing together. They aren't. My advice is to have a deeper understanding about sex and move away from the way it has been greatly perverted through media, religion, pornography, and the likes. You can gain this awareness by going within to learn about sex, through meditation, and by studying Tantra, Taoism, Song of Solomon (Bible), electricity, biology, physics, chemistry, the life of a tree, and sex magick to name a few. The next time you feel full of fire in a session or even after meditation, know that you are becoming conscious of divine energy flowing within, loving, purifying, and cleansing you. The practitioner is feeling that loving energy pouring into you and they may even sense your interpretation of it (I know I have), but they are not getting sexually aroused for your hot body or sparkling soul. To summarize:
Much love and healing vibes to you all! One of my favorite quotes comes from the late, great Johnnie Cochran, "If it doesn't fit, you must acquit." I find these words of pure wisdom applicable to most life situations. Today I hear them echoing through the halls of my dull headache, gently bouncing off the tender spots. This condition I have is probably psychosomatic but I am okay with that. It is my body's way of telling me that I should indeed "acquit". But what is it that I should acquit? Well I'll tell you...
I am a happily single woman but I didn't realize it until very recently, like really recently. Before this revelation, although unaware, I was attached to the idea of partnership and that I needed it or that it was something that I should think I need. Are you following? Recently I went on an awesome date. I had a great time and when I got home I couldn't stop talking. The interesting part was that the subject of this incessant post-date blabber was myself. I can't believe that I am typing this but I fell in even more love with myself. I liked how I carried myself. I liked my smile. I like everything about me, really. Even now I am smiling with love and admiration for sweet, wild, interesting me. I know, I know, this is all so sweet you can barely stand it. Well imagine the position I am in. I hear, "I love you." even in my sleepy hazes before I have brushed my teeth in the morning. It doesn't stop. *blushes* So what is it that I should acquit? Well we know I can't quit me. I got that Brokeback mountain unquittable kind of love. Today I realized that I can let go of the false need for partnership. It's pointless and only accentuates a false sense of loneliness. I feel so much gratitude for my life and my decisions that neediness and loneliness just don't fit. My headache today allowed me to be with myself. I didn't want to be around anyone and through it all, the love seemed to grow more. I felt myself surrendering more deeply than before to the love within. I hear that great quote and I know that I can close the case on loneliness vs Kiki. There was never a case to begin with. What have you been holding onto? What/Who are you falsely accusing of doing you wrong? Hire Johnnie and let him set it right for you. I have him on retainer. Once you are able to see your greatness and feel gratitude for all that you are, you will find a lot of the thoughts you have been holding (knowingly or unknowingly) just don't fit. I tried on the glove of loneliness and couldn't get it past my fingertips. If that ain't proof... Yesterday a man came by to fix the oven. The computer's motherboard exploded. He told me before he started that the issue would either be the temp control or the brain. I never thought of my oven having a brain, but I found it interesting that over the past few weeks the one thing that I felt was on the verge of exploding was my brain. Maybe the oven took one for the team. I have been exploring a different way of living lately. My goal is to live and make decisions completely from my heart. I can hear Teena Marie singing the words, "straight from my heart" as I type. Wait, didn't she die from heart issues? No matter, I stay on the path undeterred. I could tell you plenty of reasons why I am doing this, but I don't want to. It is a feeling that is prompting me to do this, something that beyond reason I can't shake. The reasons that have seemed to line up in a perfect queue came later, almost as a defense and I am not interested in defending myself. As a result of this internal shift, my mind seems to be rebelliously in overdrive. It plays every scenario and thought as if it will do anything to get the last word. Until this point, I don't think I have ever been so aware of my incessant mind. The heart is a whisper in comparison. It has a little voice, but it is clear. It's that shy genius that stands in a corner. You have to seek it out to receive its wisdom. The mind is the class-clown, the trouble-maker, and even the well-read scholar who has plenty of information about every topic. The heart takes to a path steady and surefooted unlike the many stumbles and detours of my mind. The hard part is being able to listen to the heart as the mind pounds, beats, and thumps louder than any heart I've ever heard. So clear is the heart once you start to clear the brush of the mind. You quickly realize how unbreakable the heart really is and how temperamental the mind is. I sat and listened to the repair man as he told me about his family, his job, and bits of his life. I noted how much my ears have improved since I have been focusing on my heart. The oven and its brain became secondary to our exchange. As I walked him to the door he mentioned how he never talked so much about his life, it wasn't something he usually did. I just smiled. What he didn't know was that I was following my protocol: think with the heart and feel with the mind. He never stood a chance. And now, right on time, Chaka sings Please Pardon Me... Music: Girl on Fire by Alicia Keys I've been doing a lot of studying lately. For the past 30 days I have been participating in a Magick challenge with a really cool group of people. We are all doing our personal work and share our experience as we feel inspired. The duration of this challenge is 40 days and I am confident that I will do it again because of all that I have learned about myself in this process. The intent of the challenge is like most 40 day ventures, profound personal transformation. Throughout the challenge I have definitely been inclined to study the so-called spiritual teachers, gurus, and people of the world. The main thing I have noticed is their inconsistency. One year they say it takes 68 seconds to make a thought into reality and the next year they say it's 17 seconds. Later they say it is just adds up. One guy made, wrote, and acted in a whole movie on "Indigo" children only to have an interview years later in which he acts like "Indigo" is a new term that he knows little about. Angels are Extra-terrestials, but we can't seem to decide if they are beautiful or ugly. Some talk of 7 chakras, others say 12, and my favorite say 112. Everyone is channeling someone or some group. Some of the information is repetitive, some interesting, profound, affirmative, and some humorous. In all of this my main subject of study is myself. I am studying the crevices of my subconscious and uncovering my personal truths. I am having wild dreams and sleeping longer than usual because sleep isn't sleep; it is school and I am in my doctoral program. Last night I was in hell or at least what I definitely could recognize as hell. All of the things, fears, people, and scenarios that truly irk me collided in one space and storyline. It ended with near arson, me jumping out of a 3-story building with pure grace, getting help, and returning to find older women taking care of the entire situation. The women moved around with a air of peace that wisdom bestows. I woke up knowing hell exists, but so does divine intervention, freedom of choice, and our ability to free ourselves from any situation that doesn't serve us. I also wondered if my jump out of the window was necessary since nothing happened or did nothing happen because I jumped out of the window? Regardless, I can't help but herald my quick ability to assess the situation and excuse myself... and laud my courage to go back. In going back, I released my fear of hell and I was rewarded with sight of the wise women. I walked in the front door and surveyed how thorough their work was and felt a new sense of confidence and relief. Everything was alright. Those things weren't my concern anymore. Though a fire never had a chance to start, I moved like a flame. The words of my aunt who told me to listen to that nudge that tells you need to leave a situation rung through me. I became the flame that I was sure would consume us all. I decided to become a fire ninja in the space of time it takes to light a match. What would you do when confronted with your own hell? Send me a note if you want to know more about the 40 day Magick Challenge at kikicinza@gmail.com. And yes, this song came blasting in my head when I woke up... Isn't twerking just bellydancing to a different beat? I just finished my "classy" twerking workout aka bellydancing and I feel the Divine swirling within and around me. I am pretty sure I have also helped heal the world after my last hip twirl. And the chimmy, please don't let me forget the chimmy which felt like I was on my way to bootyclapping if my booty was a tad larger.
Healing occurs as we allow divine energy, our true essence, to move around unimpeded. As the energy moves it balances imbalances and adds to our greater well-being. Twerking, oops I mean, Bellydancing is also incredibly empowering. If I didn't love being a woman before, I superlove it now. I know I was supposed to be looking sensual in the mirror, but I was cheesing with excitement and joy instead. That is still sensual, right? The Goddess in me says, "Absolutely, you sensual Goddess." *growls* WI just had an idea! Twerk, or for you "ladies", Bellydance and then get a Reiki session. Ooo Wee! I just paused and laid my hands on my sensual body and HOT DAMN! I think I have said enough. Twerk and heal...Twerk and heal. It was another Free Reiki Friday and I had a humongous list. There were many people who were on the list that I didn't know at all since I posted the event in an international Reiki group. As I received notification that a new person was attending I would write their name down on my list and from where they sent me their intention to participate, twitter, email, facebook, etc, so that I could follow up with them later. On that day I sent Reiki to many people whose names I couldn't pronounce. These were the kind of names that I had to carefully copy because I wasn't sure how the letters even came together to make sounds. I didn't know if they were young or old, male or female. All I had was a name that revealed zilch.
So let me tell you the story about my session with someone I will call Rihkpeyhg... Rihkpeyhg came to me via facebook. Prior to the session, I didn't look at their profile picture or do any research as I figure it to be unnecessary and time-consuming. Immediately I was drawn to the area of their sacral chakra. It felt feminine. I could feel a softness and a sensuality. As I stayed there, I started to feel a great sexual desire. Based off of cultural precepts, it would have been easily interpreted as masculine as we sometimes think only men have intense sexual desire. The feeling of sexual desire in Rihkpeyhg was strong, overwhelming, but I also got the sense that they didn't get to exercise their sexual prowess as much as they would like. Immediately I got the message that they needed to channel the energy into creative projects so that they can be more balanced and productive. I got the sense that the desire was taking over their life. As I tried to move throughout their field, I kept on going back there. Marvin Gaye was playing on my radio and the mood was very clear. Needless to say, from all of that swirling around in that sexual, creative energy, I was enjoying the session. Even though I loved how it felt, I knew a part of my job was to impart wisdom on how to use the energy. The Reiki energy flowed from me helping to bring balance to Rihkpeyhg and so did the message. I wrote down everything I got and then moved on to the next person. After all of the sessions were done, the arduous task of sending everyone their personal messages began. At that point, I had mostly forgotten the details of their sessions and relied on my notes. Since I had to send Rihkpeyhg the message I had for them, it also meant I was going to see what they looked like. In my mind I had pictured Rihkpeyhg to be a middle-aged man who hadn't got any in a while based off of the feeling and the message. I felt like the message was saying, "Look dude, you are going to have to do something else with all of that energy 'cause you ain't getting none...at least not to match all that you have going on." I was shocked and bemused to find out that good ole Rihkpeyhg was a teenaged girl, and not the legal kind. Immediately I was questioning what I should do because essentially I would be talking to a child, who wasn't my own, about sex. When in doubt, do more research, right? I dug deeper and realized that this girl had a boyfriend and even though I wasn't about that life at her age, I knew plenty of girls that were. I had to sit my inner virgin down and give her the message intended for her. While staying true to the message, I wrote to her as if her parents were over her shoulder reading her private messages. I was honest with her telling her I hesitated in relaying the message, but I also let her know what I picked up focusing the message on telling her alternative ways she could use the energy. I also lightly, like a dust particle in the atmosphere, acknowledged that she clearly wanted to boink her boyfriend. She replied with a big thank you and I felt relief when I felt her receive the message and the energy. Ahh to be young and receive Reiki... The whole thing made me think about how cool it would have been if I knew someone like me when I was that age. No judgment, just wisdom. I'm glad Rihkpeyhg wasn't a middleaged man. She taught me a lot. I have had the most interesting and profound July. It has been full of personal revelations and smatterings of this song in my daily soundtrack. Have you ever realized that someone you thought you knew so well was actually a figment of your imagination? The truth is that you probably only saw what you wanted to see. Did you also notice every time they did something that you found offensive it came as a complete shock? How could this person do that to you, right? I mean, who does that anyway? Sometimes you even questioned their mental development. You found yourself using offensive and antiquated terms like "mildly retarded" to try to make excuses for their behavior and mannerisms. Maybe they were just tired or they had gas. Is it just me? I can't be the only one who walked around calling people "dumb country" and "mildly retarded". If it is just me, I can handle the head shakes and finger wags of disapproval since I have already forgiven myself, but on the off chance that it isn't, keep reading...or just keep reading. In the past, I have had a very interesting way of learning in life. It seems that whenever I did something for the first time, from relationships to card games, I did it perfectly (or darn-near). It is when I tried to repeat my gloriousness is when the lesson started to kick in. The first time I played spades, I was a champ. The second time was forgettable. The first time I played laser tag, I slayed all of those little kids. The second time..well I remember feeling a vibration sensation more times than I would like to mention. The first time I decided to fall in love, I knocked it out of the park. When the second time came around, I was in a delusional haze with an absent-minded professor. It was a funny time in my life. I had been doing yoga for some time, reading lots of spiritual books, worked in the backroom of a bookstore, and was convinced I loved the world. I remember sitting in a crowded NYC subway car imagining hugging all of the passengers. I did that as a ritual. Yes, I was that weirdo with the big smile on her face in a sea of stone-faced commuters. I truly thought I was love on two legs. Mind you, all of this love that I had was in no way being directed to me. Of course not, I was too busy loving the whole world. I fancied myself a beautiful, flexible butterfly in a pink and aqua tutu sprinkling love and joy to everyone I fluttered by. By the time I met the absent-minded professor, I was deep in the trenches of my loveland illusion. Without having to go into detail about what happened, I rather fast forward to the song. It is all in the title really, I really didn't know the absent-minded professor. There are often two sides to us, the person we project to the world and the person we truly are. When you really get to know yourself, you can see how they can work together, but before then life is just a big mirage of our colorful projections. I was doing a lot of projecting at that time while my true self was in a coma. I loved everyone and walked around very confident, but if you asked me if I loved myself, I would have had a confused look on my face. I then would have said, "yeah" hoping it was true only to question it later when I was by myself. The truth was that I didn't know myself and I had yet to begin the journey of self love. Yeah I knew my personality traits and such, but I didn't KNOW myself from a place of true love. I was caught up on the cartoon-like yogi projection of me and not who I was. I projected so well that I thought that the absent-minded professor was just like me. Sometimes I even thought he was me. This lead to great disappointment as he revealed who he was to me because he did things that I wouldn't do...and how could he do them if he was just like me? He was screwing with my perfect picture of love, sunshine, and daffodils. I was devastated and wanted to place blame. It had to be the absent-minded professor, right?...Nah. I failed to get to know him and I didn't really know who I was. I failed to realize that I was in a relationship and fundamental battle with myself and not him. Poor thing, but the absent-minded professor had very little to do with the whole debacle. In many ways, the whole thing was my grand attempt to hold onto a false absent-minded image of me. The failures of that experience became a great catalyst for where I am today. I have learned to love myself deeply, know who I am and accept myself with a full heart, and on top of that, I really like myself. Hopefully he learned something too. In writing all of this the question still remains, why did this song come up now? Recently the absent-minded professor contacted me using very similar words that he used years ago. Years ago, those words erupted an anger in me that burnt little holes in my butterfly wings, but this time it was just kind of funny. I took it as a test, happy to find myself passing, and in my head I heard the song playing. Ben and Regina tickled divine confirmation in my ears! Immediately I realized that all of that time, I didn't know the absent-minded professor at all...and with relief and joy, I laughed. I took the last bits of my false projection down, saw the clear picture, and I laughed. When I give a Reiki session or a counseling session I am working within my clients energetic field. In simple terms, I am reading them. In addition to that, as an Empath, I can also feel what that person is feeling. It is pretty unavoidable and since it helps me help the person I am working with, I just go with it. Things tend to get funny when I am working with someone who is able to do similar work. Not too many people like to be read, but I find the hardest clients to work with are fellow Intuitives AKA Psychics AKA Readers. I know it takes a lot for me to open up to another Reader so I am not shocked when I feel resistance from them. I remember when I was scheduled for a reading from a Psychic that prior to the reading (which was over the phone) I could feel her trying to get into my energy field. I have such a strong shield around me that I had to go into a slight meditation to let her in.
I often get a few Intuitives on Free Reiki Fridays and it is always a little weird. The first reason is that they know the value of the work I am doing more than those who do not spend a lot of time in the spiritual world, so why do they want something free? And if it is out of curiosity, isn't this the point that they should engage their intuition to determine if they should work with me or not? Don't get me wrong, I have done the same thing. Recently I saw a woman offering free 3 minute readings and I inquired about it. I guess free really means no commitment or risk. We don't expect much with free. It was like I wanted to test her out and maybe they are doing the same thing...and it is all good, until I have to read them. Reading a Psychic isn't much different from reading someone else because Psychics are just people who have tapped into their inherent gifts. At the end of the day and if they eat well, they still drop loads in the toilet like everyone else. The main difference is that I find the information that I receive to be more down to earth. With most clients, I find myself saying that they should work on meditation or connect with their ancestors, but with psychics the messages are more like "clean up your house" or "go to the club and chill" or "your baby is becoming more independent and you should be ready for that". I don't choose the messages and the tone always seems to be very catered to the individual. Keep in mind that I am giving a Reiki session, so these messages come as I am in different parts of their body/auric field. After the energy has stopped flowing I write down what I got and then send it to them in a message. This is where it always gets funny (not in a ha ha way). My ego has been tested every time I have sent out the messages. First of all, it isn't easy to give out these messages because they are so personal. Secondly, as clear as it was when I got the message, I begin to question if I should send it. Before I doubt myself, I just start typing. I start at the beginning of my list and keep going until everyone has received their message. Within a few hours the replies start rolling in. Most of them are thank yous with a few questions, but the psychics always act like they forgot they signed up for Free Reiki Friday. I get, "Is this message for me?" or "What is this?" This could really screw with my confidence if I hadn't already received so much confirmation from the other people on the list. So that is the point where I have to quiet my ego that wants to boast and say, "You know good and well that message was for you." I take a deep breath, come from the heart, and simply say a "yes" and maybe a "thank you". I know had it been the other way around, I would be offering a similar reply because of that weird feeling that someone was all up in my business. Being read can be an invasive procedure no matter how loving the reader is. It can be downright scary because the reality is that you are asking for someone to help you with something that you have a hard time acknowledging or healing on your own. The other side is that when you are reading people on a regular basis, it can give you a false sense of security and even superiority. You become the giver, the provider, and no longer the receiver. You can feel on top of it all, but how quickly you can fall when another reader can see that your house is a hot mess. Even though I was testing out that psychic recently, I am glad that I was at least willing to be open. We all need help sometimes and I think it is the strongest of people who really know how to receive it with grace, trust, and openness. I am working on being one of those people. In saying all of that I do have to say there is also a wonderfully amazing side to working with highly intuitive clients. I'll explore more of that in the next journal. |
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